I'll Have That Drink Now
by DescartesThinksNot
Summary: Sometimes you have to laugh to keep from crying.


"If it's all the same to you, I'll have that drink now." Loki was, in fact, defeated.

Tony looked at the others, then said, "You know, I could use one too."

"Shouldn't we cuff him first?" Steve said. "And there's a hell of a lot of clean up to do."

"I think the big guy can handle him." Tony smirked at Loki, tapping the Hulk on the arm. "And the police can handle things down there for now." He strode over to the bar as if he hadn't almost been nuked and poured himself a drink. The others were still poised for more fighting. "No one else?" Tony asked. "You guys are making me feel like an alcoholic. Come on. He's not going anywhere. Are you, Loki?"

Loki shook his head, eyes narrowed in annoyance.

"I think that's something to drink to," Tony said. "And seeing as my bar is the only thing that wasn't destroyed, I say we make the most of the situation."

The Hulk shifted back to Bruce. "I'm in." He walked over to the bar with Tony.

Tony smiled, handing Bruce the bottle. "One drink, then Thor can have Loki and we can all be on our merry ways."

"Very well," Thor said.

Clint and Natasha exchanged a look, shrugged, and walked over to the bar. Clint put his arrow back in its quiver and set the bow on the bar, but did not relax. He kept his eye on Loki.

Thor grabbed Loki and roughly shoved him into a chair by the bar.

Steve held his ground for a moment, then sighed. "Fine. But everyone stay on guard."

Tony rolled his eyes. "So, everyone, what was your favorite part of the day? Mine was getting thrown out a window-" He tilted his glass at Loki. "-and almost dying heroically to save the world." He tilted his glass at Steve.

The captain pressed his lips together. "Alright, fine. I was wrong about you."

"As so many people are." Tony took a drink.

"But don't make light of what just happened," Steve said sternly. "People died today."

"People die everyday," Loki said. "You're always killing each other."

"As right as you are, your input is not appreciated," Tony said. "Here, try this and shut up." He handed a cup to Loki.

Bruce glanced at Tony with a slight question, but didn't want to ask it in front of the others.

"So are we still a time bomb?" Natasha asked.

"Yes," Bruce said, "but the good kind."

"There's a good kind?" Clint said.

A little uneasy laughter started creeping up on the group.

Tony nodded to himself. "By the way, next time the world is being attacked, I would appreciate you all showing up before I get thrown out of any windows. I can not tell you how much I would appreciate that."

Natasha chuckled slightly. "You're not going to let that go for awhile are you."

"I currently have no plans to," Tony said.

The atmosphere was gradually lightening, which was Tony's goal. He started another round of drinks, again handing a specific one to Loki.

"You know that your victory is only temporary," Loki said. "Others will come. This won't end with my defeat."

Tony rolled his eyes. "You know some of are trying to enjoy the moment, so if you could just never speak again, that'd be fantastic."

"You think I fear you?" Loki hissed. "You have no comprehension of the forces you're dealing with. I am a god."

"Yes, well, so are a few other people in this room," Tony sighed.

Loki glared at him, started to say something else, but his words blurred into mumbled and he slumped in the chair. His cup shattered on the floor.

"Finally," Tony said.

"What did you do?" Thor demanded, investigating his brother to make sure he wasn't seriously hurt.

"I drugged him. Seemed like the easiest way to keep him contained until all the nitty gritties are sorted out."

"You poisoned him?" Thor reached for his hammer.

"He'll be fine," Tony said. "That stuff wouldn't even kill a human."

"You keep drugs in your bar?" Bruce said.

"This is the first time I've used them, but yeah, why not?" Tony said. "Never know when there's going to be an invader. It happens more often than you'd think."

Steve frowned disapprovingly, but didn't say anything.

"So, Loki is incapacitated, his army isn't getting up, well, ever, and the proper authorities are doing their jobs." Tony nodded, quite pleased with himself. "So we have time to help, try shawarma, and applaud our brilliance. Go team."


End file.
